Breathe

Breathe,

she said, her voice calm and soft amid the chaos.

In through your mouth

and out through your nose. She says

You will be surprised where this takes

you. How it turns unbearable to believable.

Her voice a calm in the storm.

Breathe;

because here we are

in this moment

and there is truly no other option.

Breathe;

in the knowledge

that soon,

so soon,

he will be here

his arms open

his heart open; your son.

Waiting waiting waiting

and breathing;

Simply because the earth willed it so.

Breathe;

because you are, as he is

a child of this earth. 

(for Corey and Tanya, the mamas of boys soon to be here.With love)

Changes.

So I've been thinking about this blog amidst the five thousand other things I could be thinking about in a day and I have decided that there are going to be some housekeeping and/or changes around here. I have been keeping this as a family blog for a few years- mainly as a way that our far flung relations have an easy access to witness the growings of our little ones.
I think I might have grown out of the need to broadcast my personal life like this- and have decided that I would like to turn this instead into a blog devoted to the writing I set out in college to do. I guess at this point I don't really care if anybody else reads it- I think that by doing it I will slowly learn to feel better in my skin about life as a self declared writer.

Many of you know me on Face Book and in personal life, so there you will see my children. There will be my news. Here is out to be something different.
I'm not going to delete past entries, just morph and change into something else entirely.
Rather like life and growing it's self.

Thanks for being here for the ride.

Time.

It's been a really long time.

 

Fall's gone

This morning I woke up to a layer of white on the porch. It was still softly snowing, and the snow plows were already buzzing down the street clearing the way for the morning commuters.
As I do every winter I was struck with the reaction of both- "Awh, how lovely..." AND "Oh, crap, already?"
I'm not a winter person. I don't even own a pair of winter boots. Finally when I turned 25 I got for my birthday a fabulously warm LLBean winter coat, but in most all regards I am ill equipped to deal with the temperatures and temperment of a Maine winter. Mostly because I'm in denial. Mostly because somewhere deep inside I still think someday I will escape to the south of France or North Carolina for the winter. Sigh. Not likely anytime soon.

Our fall was a lovely and full one.
Work, play, sleep, repeat.
The oldest of the wee ones began school again, very happily. Last night she declared herself a "bat nerd" and that she knew all there was to know about bats. She has also been semi-happily ballet dancing (but very beautifully and gracefully! I don't know where she got that!). Her little sister watches her with unadulterated adoration. It's the sweetest thing to watch, and something I understand completely having older sisters myself. It's been a beautiful thing to watch as their relationship grows and change. They truly enjoy one another and the company. I watch it very happily. Ah, my girls.

MIA

So, not sure what is going on, but for the past couple of weeks, I haven't had the desire to be here.
And I apologize.
Especially after I have had so much of my family applaud my efforts to keep them informed and up to date on the comings and goings of our lives here... not sure, but I guess just like in Your Midcoast Mama, I felt the need for a time away, a vacation, so to speak. And it's been nice. Really nice.

Not a whole lot has changed around here. A certain little one starts second grade in a few days, back to the school where she was two years ago. She is excited and nervous all at the same time. I foresee some tears, but I imagine she is going to be just fine. She knows what is coming...which is a whole new thing from a couple of years ago and she was a fresh fish. We bought her a new pair of lace of sneakers and she is proudly learning how to tie them and how to run beside me.
It amazes me to really stop and see her for all that she is...in all she is becoming. Beautiful, strong, smart and sweet. Watching your babies grow is flat out a miracle.

The littlest bean is also growing in leaps and bounds. Changing daily, as to be expected.
She's afraid of the train's whistle and the thunder, loves to cuddle and completely obsessed with fresh carrots from the garden and apples. And peaches. (which she calls apples). She adores her big sister, and all her baby dolls and spends loads of time kissing and cuddling with both.

Our house is coming along. Each step brings us closer to moving in...now we are looking at late fall/early winter... (trying to get as much done BEFORE moving in as possible...!)

Along with my month long break of blogging, I also have not taken any photos. But I will. That's next.

I hope the month has been sweet, summery and wonderful for you all, and that life is treating you well.
Thanks for reading.

grandpa, cousins, brothers, aunts, uncles, nieces and nephews...

An afternoon at the youngest of my brother's... down a long dirt road. Naked babies, river jumping, giggling and crying babes, laughing siblings, and one happy happy Grandpa.

A list for today

1. Dream.
2. Laugh.
3. Hope.
4. Wish.
5. See.
6. Discover.
7. Enjoy.

(My seven for this day.)