This past week our camera broke. And I am trying to not be SO bummed about it, but I have come to the realization that I live through the images of my girls in a way I had never hoped to be before. I have always loved being behind a camera, but never thought I was that fantastic of a photographer, so I didn't make it a huge effort in my life. I viewed photo-taking as an art form, and for sure it wasn't mine. After the babies, though, I have come to realize that no matter what kind of photographer you are, once you have kids, you are one. It is the only sure-fire way to have your babies recorded for all eternity and to never forget what they looked like when they were two days old. Two months old. Two years...and so on.
So, needless to say, I am immeasurably depressed about the camera. I have loftly dreams of finding the camera I truely love, one that manuelly focuses, with more then one lense and is still digital so I can upload them onto the computer and share with my distant family. Multiple thousands of dollars, you know. And of course that it simply not the world we live in right now.
Our house is halfway built and I am working one half day a week. Not the time for extravagent purchases like a camera. Nope. Not by a long shot.
I called Canon yesterday and was put directly to the automated "help" service. Not bloody helpful, in my opinion. I followed all the voice commands and found out exactly nothing, except that I could send it in, and hopefully it could be repaired. Fingers crossed. This little beauty is not only a source of my joy, but also a major tool for Travis right now. He uses it to snap photographs of "maybe" drawings, the progress of current building projects and as a portfolio recorder to his timberframes. And so.
My cousin recently left for a trip to Italy. She is in her early twenties and opted out of taking a camera because she wanted to remember her trip in her own way. I remember saying something very similar ten years ago, but now I mourn that fact. I wish I had better recorded years of my life now that I have begun. There is so much to remember. I do it mostly with my own mind, of course, but the photos definitely give you a starting off place.
And I never want to forget my girls at these ages. They are my every joy.