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Sunday, May 6, 2012

coming home/being home

Opening the front door onto the porch, looking out onto the very green of the field.

My littlest one explores the blades of grass with such intensity I can hardly imagine a time when I took life so slowly.
Although I know I did.
And really it wasn't that long ago.

This past week has been challenging. On Tuesday we discovered I had Lyme disease. It had begun to manifest itself in the way of high fever, aching body, pounding head and extreme fatigue.  Which means three weeks of antibiotics. Which I hate to do (breastfeeding and all), but I tell you, once those things entered my body and I felt the extreme symptoms of the Lyme leaving- I was in shock. In the years between doses of antibiotics (last time I took them was about five years ago when I had tonsilitus) I had forgotten how it kicks your infections right on out. With a hard swift kick. Amazing.
I am no way saying I think antibiotics are a good everyday thing...nope, I like my belly flora as much as the next guy, but wow. When you have Lyme, a wicked case of mastitis, or strep throat...

My wee one and I opened the door yesterday and headed out. I followed her slowly. Finding your legs again after sleeping for three days has been a slow process. Motherhood makes you stumble up. Out. Prepare food. Do laundry. No more sleeping, mama, is what I've been told. In not so many words.
Here I come.
Baby steps, just like my baby. Watching each ant and patch of green. Apple blossoms.

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