A list for today

1. Dream.
2. Laugh.
3. Hope.
4. Wish.
5. See.
6. Discover.
7. Enjoy.

(My seven for this day.)

a morning walk

Portland through her eyes

Tuesday in photos

there is

-a calmness to our days which reminds me it's ok to not always say "what's next,"

-a relief in the nothing/peace/calm of sitting in a chair reading to my girls.

-unplanned suppers and unknown breakfast.

-ice cream eaten before piano lessons.

-naps taken accordingly.

-lilacs brought in the house and filling a mason jar on our kitchen table.

-plants dug and shared.

-"why is it still light at bedtime, mama?"

-lessons of the Lord's prayer from our neighbour who knows it by heart. (along with cookies...)

-giggles in the long grass, wet and rolled up pant legs.

-letting things go, and people be who they are.

Lesson plan

Lessons:

(For her):

Looking at the globe.

Days of the week.

days/hours/minutes/seconds

Writing letters.

Cursive.


(For me):

Breathing.

Not complaining.

Being grateful.

Enjoying.

Smiling. (Relaxing...taking it all as it is, as it comes...)

Loving (even if...)(all of it)


Dang, hard stuff.

Early morning

Waking up and being alone for a couple of hours is the key to my sanity right now. It's  kind of a wonderful space, really. It isn't as if I don't love and adore the time I spend with my sweet little family. I do. But the true challenge of mama-hood for me is that I never have the space to have my own arms and legs and do what I want when I want to. (Or when I need to...) My sweet darling of a husband took one look at my greasy mug yesterday and said "when was the last time you had a shower?" and I had to think back....um...

It isn't as though I am complaining. Sometimes the business of days just gets away from you. I have a dear friend who also is at home with a little one and her big girl is also homeschooled, and we share the "holy cow, how does anything EVER get done" syndrome. There is a blogger/author/amazing woman named Amanda Blake Soule, who does an amazing job at mama-hood, writer-ness, and homeschooling her six children. My friend and I stare at each other blankly. How does she do it? And still have time for creativity? We both agree that our two children boogle our minds and we barely have time to wash the mountains of dishes that take over every evening.  Sometimes I have to remind myself that when I was my little one's age, my mother had two babies in diapers and no running water. Wood stoves to feed, paths to shovel and laundry to tote. I look at the dust of our three little rooms and remember to be grateful. In terms of people on this earth, we are truly very very lucky.

Reminding myself that little ones as little ones only lasts so long. And before you know it, your baby is seven years old and as beautiful as the day is long.  Long streaky dark blonde hair and thin strong arms and legs.  A power and strength all her own and passions, love, and faith that the universe is a wonderful place.  I can't believe how fast time has gone. I know that my parents think the same, thirty years gone by. Life is like that I suppose, and I suppose that is how it happens that parents become grandparents and children grow up.
I try and remember each day, and cherish the little girls that I have in my arms, knowing full well that before I blink they will be long, tall, other versions of myself and their fathers. (Both wonderful and loving men that they are). But truly their own, in every single way, these girls are growing up beautifully. I have the utmost faith, and a wonderful community to be thankful for.

queen of the beach snow bank

trying out Tilly's stroller!

Flamanco Funk

This is what Aunties are for, right?

Totally.

Reading to Grandpa

And then, one day we discovered this at the farm stand, and the littlest one just had to try out driving the tractor...you know...

As well as getting quinoa in her nose. Because when you are almost 11 months old, it is all about doing it on your own. With no spoon and positively NO help. (She also managed to feed it to the floor, all in her seat, all over mama's lap, etc,etc. Some managed to get in her mouth, I think...

change

After the time changed, or rather, after the clocks were changed, I found myself unable to keep sleeping. And so, if it was four thirty am when I was waking, now it is three thirty. And it's ok. I don't mind. Mostly because someone has me crawling into bed with her at seven thirty pm, with jammies on and lights out. And that's ok. I did this for years before. And still, my big girl sees us cuddling down in the big huge bed and wants in on the action. For years she wanted to stay up with us and read in the other room, but now she sees where her sister and I are headed and wants in on it.

The weather has been so bazaar lately here, sixty degrees one day, twenty five the next...but even if. Something about the knowledge that winter is on it's way makes me want to nestle down and drink hot tea and make soup.  We still go for long walks, almost daily, but start with many layers that are easy to take off. With the little ones we seem to need to have a destination, otherwise it will begin with feet dragging. But that's part of the joy...! (and admittedly, it almost always involves stopping in at a favourite cafe for Mama's coffee... and maybe a little chocolate pansy...)

We have been collecting fir cones and acorns, old crunchy leaves and pine needles. My girl tries to bring in the bird berries (what we call the red berries growing this time of year. I dubbed them that years ago when she was so into berries I was terrified she would try them out when my back was turned...) Horse chestnuts and shiney rocks. A big salad bowl sits on the counter waiting to see what this all shall turn into...I have a feeling it might just be the joy of collecting.  Even if, it is fun all the same.

And so, here I am at four thirty, dreaming of our day. It's wonderful to find myself awake and alone in these early morning hours, it gives me a little time to breathe and simply be alone. I cherish these moments every day...and realize that this is a part of what keeps me sane in all the chaos of our regular day to day life. I need the time. Strange as it may seem to my friends and family who find out I wake up so early, I need it. They stay up late after putting their kids to bed, and I simply do the opposite. After years of baking and opening coffee shops, it's really not that off base.
Another day...





a girl takes photos

there is a girl in our family who loves to take photos.
And although I do too, it's not me.

It is amazing to me to see this. Mostly because I remember taking photos as a kid, and the whole world is through another perspective...  (Gives us a glimpse of life through a six year old's eyes again... just lovely...)

these days

These days there hasn't been much time for much of anything. I've been trying to wade through the piles, hearing the mess crinkle around me, as we ready for the cold weather that keeps threatening on arriving. The sun still feels wonderful and hot, though we started pulling on the wool layers. I told a friend that I am in denial during these fall months. I suit the kids up enough so they sweat, but I try and get away with sweatshirts and light jackets until Christmas. Then it seems like it is really winter and maybe ok to wear down coats and winter boots. (although, however, I don't actually own winter boots. Every single year I make fun of myself brutally on this fact, because what's a Maine girl without winter boots? Welllll...I haven't owned a pair since I was a kid, unless you count Muck boots or Doc Martens. Thinking it might be the year to finally buy some when they go on clearance at Reny's...in March...)

Halloween and All soul's day passed, mostly uneventfully. We had two trick or treaters, which was a new all time high, considering we usually get none.  My big girl dressed up as Pocahontas, and I kept hoping that she meant the real Pocahontas, although I am fairly certain she had the disney princess in her mind.
Try as I might with library books and The People's History of the United States...  but I think she had a wonderful time. The little one wore a hand-me-down lion costume for all of about fifteen minutes. She looked hysterical, especially when she started in on her lion growl, on all fours of course, cruising around the floor. She grabbed one of the little candy bars we had in a basket and started wacking it against the wall. Funny girl.


We've been homeschooling for the past three weeks, and I think it's going pretty well. My girl had her first piano lesson yesterday (Thanks Kat!!!) and she LOVED it. She practices reading and writing everyday, does tons of art projects and playing. I'm not too disciplined on the academic aspect, but more leaning on the fun, and whatever strikes her interest.
It seems to be the way to go with her. She is so curious about everything. It's a beautiful thing to see. I don't know why I never considered doing this sooner. Last night we made lanterns out of all the empty recycled glass jars (not my beloved Mason jars, of course, just the empty mayo and nut butter jars...) She had a blast painting them.

girls in bed...

well....

adorable company.

learning/settling/being

A Tuesday in October was the first day I would "homeschool" my oldest daughter.  I tried to be organized, in some respects, mostly so that she wouldn't understand that I was riding without a map. I don't think she had any inkling of this fact, thank goodness.
Our day looked like this:

breakfast with each other and the baby
brush teeth, etc...
reading time
writing time
walking to the library (spending almost 1 and 1/2 hours there...)
coming home for lunch and naps (for the wee one...)
collecting bits of pieces of trees, the world and nature's beauty on the way home
(as in "Do I have more fir cones or horse chestnuts, Mama...? I'm gonna count and find out!")
quiet time/reading
walking to the cafe for a treat (15 cents...)
out door playing (jump roping, hopscotch, sidewalk drawing) and then with the neighbours (learning how slingshots work... and about 12 year old boys....)
dinner making/eating
cleaning up
getting ready for our company!!!
BedTIME.

another day begins right now...

my girl in 2009...how much she has changed!!!